Early Father’s Day Special!-

Because it’s going to be a bit busy, and you’re all going to be out making father’s (hopefully) proud, we’re posting this one a few days early. We’ve asked the whole gang to tell us about their fathers. These are all the responses we got.

Mechon- “Well, I really didn’t have a father, or a mother come to think of it. I mean, look at me! I’m a over 2,000-year-old robot, that should have come quick to your squishy brain. Back to the topic at hand, the only “Parents” I have was a 40-ton outdated assembly machine. I know it’s nothing but rusted scrap, but I feel a bit… sorry for it. It really couldn’t do anything else but crank out 25th-generation Mecbots 25/7. I wonder, sometimes, if it really wasn’t sentient, or if it was just… I don’t know, playing dumb. Yeah, this didn’t answer you question at all, didn’t it? Well, um… Sorry? You should move along before this get’s any more uncomfortable.”

Hazmius- “Um. I don’t have any fathers, or mothers. I’m a fireball in a metal suit in a cloth suit. I mean, maybe I actually did, but I don’t know. I spend a lot of my spare time trying to figure out where I came from, being a sentient fireball and all. I know if I did have a father, he would probably be very proud of where I am right now and all the things I’ve seen and done in my “infinite” lifetime. I doubt there would be any family resemblance between our faces, though. Ha ha ha! Oh, just thinking about makes me feel even warmer inside.”

Luni- “My father? He’s… er, well, passed on now, but he was a pretty big deal back in his day! One of our elders, he was, and he didn’t take attitude from no one or no body. I only saw him when I was very little, and he always gave me this face. Like a “You don’t have a clue what you’re in for” kind of look. He left with the rest of my family for somewhere and kind of… just got busy somewhere else, I guess. I don’t know why he didn’t come back, but he was quite a rabble-rouser so I doubt he died of some stupid thing like getting killed or such. Um, look, can we… can you go now? I’m probably killing this whole father’s day whatever-it-is mood right now. Oh yeah, he’d be proud of me, being the leader of our people and all, that’s true.”

Daki- “My father… I don’t know who he is. I know I had one, I had to come from somewhere. My databanks were wiped of my memories of when I was just constructed, but sometimes I get little blips of him here and there. I know he’s a he, of course, but his name keeps coming up as “Master“. Gives me an odd feeling of defying my prime directive, which freaks me out. I know he was a good man, though, so I doubt I was built for anything wrong. I wonder what he’d say right now if he saw me… I’d go and say he’d be proud of me right now for being the head of HEXA and all, but I don’t know… Maybe I was built for something more different altogether. I wonder if he’s even still around right now. “

Haeon- “My father was a crazy guy, but not as nuts as my uncle,  Steel. But that’s another yarn for another time. Pops was a really rowdy sort of guy, and he built all these weird doodads that seemed to have no real purpose whatsoever, like a generator that powered itself and a type of crazy produce-powered engine. He went out with a bang, as he tried to build some time of antimatter bomb, but didn’t realize what antimatter did to matter. He didn’t even freak out. I don’t know if he’d be proud of me, making a living of the idea that killed him off, but knowing him and his crazy grin, I bet he is! I bet your fancy tape machine he is and will be!”

The Shamanama Guy & The Artichoke Guy- Let’s not go there.

B1-C & N3-G- “Why are you asking both of us? We’re not brothers and our fathers are completely different people! You know what, screw it, this interview is over!” “No, N-pal, don’t do that! He’s probably a decent guy who has plenty of more things to do than be beaten to a pulp by the likes of-” “Okay fine, but he’s leaving!” “All right, fair enough. *I’m sorry mister, but when he get’s like this you better not argue with him.*”

AbOMI- “Being an A.I., it’s kind of… strange and difficult to explain the concept of a “father” of me. I hate to say it but… that does not compute.”

Cegos- “Why? It is none of your… concern.”

Well, that wasn’t exactly what we expected. But anyhow, go on and give your father a grand old time this Sunday! I’m sure the guy who made you who you are (I mean that in a mental sense, folks) will appreciate it.

Rants 2.2: Gutterances & The Spin-Cycle of Despair!

Because I’m kind of in a stressed mood this month (thank you, finals/final projects…), let’s talk about what I do whenever I feel this way. It’s not all that bad, it’s just… demoralizing.

My usual stress-y sadness is always accompanied by what I call The Spin Cycle of Despair.

I’m sure this doesn’t only happen to me, but it sucks and there is no easy way to bypass this. However sometimes I do really well with tests and such, and it’s all uphill. “I can do this!” I’ll think to myself. “I’m capable of getting a very good grade! I am actually smart when it comes to Math/History/Literature!” Then the cycle goes in a sort of reverse mode. It’s great when it comes to it, but then I get my hopes too high, a bad grade comes in, and the cycle begins all over again. This (thank goodness) isn’t some kind of mental disease where I have to take a pill, or maybe 20 pills to fix this. This is my own freaking fault and I will someday not destroy myself from within whenever this stuff happens.

This sadness has a very fun part to it, though. “Wait, what?” I hear you cry. “You slowly die inside and somehow manage to make it funny while doing so?!” Yes, my imagination skills have allowed me to reflect on this sadness by emitting sounds similar to that of “Guttural Utterances” or, you guessed it, “Gutterances”!

Gutterances are deep, groan-like sounds to show your complete distain or unwillingness to perform any task. Each one has a unique level of how much you don’t want to do something. If it’s something like you not wanting to play a game of catch with a friend who wants to, you simply use “Mreeeeh…”. If it’s something worse, like you not wanting to listen to someone’s guitar solo, but he will play it no matter what you say, you use the deeper “Gnoaaaaaagghhhhh…!!”. And, for you-know-who’s, (People who simply irk you by darning to speak when you’re not in the mood), you use the I.C.B.M. of the Gutterances: Something you completely made up like “GNAHOOGARBLEGRRRHOOOAHN…HETHKKK…KKK…HKK…!“

It not only has to be used to show the fact that you’re in no mood for whatever! You can use it for scaring off predators (Disclaimer: We cannot guarantee your safety whatsoever), showing your anger to the world, methods of communicating with alien species (non-intelligent ones, I assume), flash-mobbing, or just being weird during any moment. You can even come up with “signature” Gutterances!

So, whenever I’m feeling down but don’t want to dwell on it for too long, I simply lay down and emit a sound that resembles that of a deflating bagpipe.

Exactly like a deflating bagpipe.

And We’re Back on The Air!

Yuppiy-yup-yup! (That means “Yup” or “Yes”.) Mechapress is back in business! Well, “business” really. As you can guess from the upper photo, illustrations are now coming to The Mechapress! And by “coming” I mean “are already here”! How awesome is that? Probably not as awesome as, say, a space-faring robo-turtle or a catapult that launches frog-cowboys, but awesome nonetheless.

So what’s been up and about when I was gone? Well, for starters, I left the place alone for a while to see what would happen when I ”threatened” to shut a few areas down for good if they didn’t get any views. Afterwards, I spent most of my time playing Awesomenauts , which I bought off Steam to play with some friends. I also received a tax-refund thing in the mail that says that it’s worth 400 dollars. I’m not that advanced in economic jargon, but I somehow managed to “earn” a 400 dollar check through said ignorance, so it’s all good! I have no plans with the cash infusion, so I’ll just stash it away or something. Yes, I know it’s “not using it”, but you don’t give a guy like me 400 dollars and expect him to use it wisely. I can guess that I would spend it all Disneyland-Style, but with videogames and DLC’s instead of stuffed animals and theme-park rides.

In case you didn’t see already, A.A. has been removed for good as no one responded to it’s requests. I guess I can’t just ask for user-based content yet. Oh well.

Anyhow, I have a few long-term plans for the M.P., such as tidying up the Database, jazzing up this web theme with new illustrations of Mechon, Hazmius, Daki, Haeon, Luni and the rest in the background (I’ll need to scan in pencil illustrations for THAT one, with my nonexistent scanner.) and finally getting around to using The Wall. It’s going to be a busy Summer after…

Hoh’ boy, I almost forgot about the dreaded thing about High-School: FINALS WEEK. Dun dun duuuuuun…!

Wish me luck on… June 3rd to June 6th, guys. It’s going to be a horrible gauntlet of full-on unit reviews on things we learned in the beginning of the year and all forgot!

It’s like re-living all the quizzes in your year, but all at once and it’s reviewed for like life depends on it.

Why? Why Must it be Like This?!

Okay! So, according to recent activity, or rather, the lack of it, nobody reads this blog anymore. I find that depressing. I still remember my record amount of unique views in one day… 98 people. Now I’m lucky if I get one hundredth of that. If you nonexistent viewers haven’t noticed, I’m getting a tiny bit desperate for some people to read this on a regular basis. (You know who you are, CobaltForum users.)

Because of this not-so-very recent decline in viewer intake, I’m going to take a very bad decision on my part away from this blog soon, and reform them into newer, better, less viewer (you people, in case you weren’t knowing) feedback based. Not right away, of course! If things change (for the better) soon, I may just leave them up there because there’s a point to them being there.

So, let’s take a quick recap of what I’m asking of you again, yes?

First: Comment on what I write! I mean, I don’t care what you say (unless it’s meaningful and friendly), you could write random junk like: “Copy/paste this on one million comment threads and win a lifetime’s supply of iPod Minis!!1!!1!!!111!!1″ I just need to know people read this. Like, use their eyes to see the symbols on the screen and perceive them as words to understand and comprehend them into phrases with meaning. It’s not that hard.

Second: See the A.A. category? On the sidebar to the right? Yeah, that? It’s empty right now, but I hope it to have a series of posts soon. What you need to do is to ask a… fictional character I made (not saying who yet!) a question. That simple! Just write it as a comment and I’ll take it and get him to write up a response, post-haste! It’s that easy! When I get enough I’ll make the first batch.

Third (Not really): The Wall is empty, but it won’t be very soon! I just need some feedback when things start popping up in there. It’s for the greater good of the Mechapress, and… other things, too. You won’t be disappointed! I swear.

See? That’s all there is to it. Now I’ll just wait here and see if this time it works or not. Fingers crossed!

F.Y.I., if there’s no responses at all by 4/12, I’ll prepare to take the categories and pages down and “fix” (launch into a black hole) them up.

Rants 2.1: Help, I’m Drowning in Nothing!

Before I get to the main point of today’s post, let me get one small thing out-of-the-way.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!! I am so sorry I left you for so long! I was waiting for someone to read the last post and reply, but nobody did! I am bowing down in shame, mashing my typing hands and now they hurt. There, are we ok now? Good, I can stop shouting now.

Ok, now that that’s out-of-the-way, let’s get down to some business. Um, if there was any…? To, you know, get to.

Aw, nuts, what am I doing here again? It’s been so long since I wrote anything, so I’m out of practice. The site was also getting a bit dusty and smelled a bit old, so ignore the smell of incense around here, it’s just to get the fresh feeling back here again. (To obtain the full effect here, burn some incense of your own. Or go and buy some if you don’t own any. Marketing, yay!) So far nothing has happened these past weeks, it’s just been the same routine, nothing special, nothing awesome. I did eat two massive bagels the other day and- Good heavens above, what am I doing?!

This blog here was made for the sole purpose of being interesting, awesome, and… um, interesting again. I managed to somehow, temporarily defeat that purpose for a whole minute and not notice it. What is wrong with me today?!

You know what, I’m going to cut this one short and recuperate a tad, and come back in a while and do better than I did here.

Oh, one last thing before I go!

See the post below? Read it and actually reply to it, please. I’m counting on you fellows and- ugh, it’s not working, is it. Ok, I’m putting a link right here (See it? With the underline?), click it, read the post it leads to, and respond by commenting, or even tweeting to me @Librus107. Thank you.

All right, I’ll be back in a few… hours, maybe a day. See you, same time, same channel!

Partial Mental Distress Call!

Ok, first off, many of the things that are coming you’ve already seen, such as The Wall and A.A.. Both of these are going to require some feedback from you, the viewers (if you actually exist). Because of this, I am asking of you, yes you, to spread the word so I can get more input, and also provide input yourselves! Please do so! I may have gotten my hopes up, but this is the only thing I require of you, the people I have typed away (until my fingers are sore) for! As a thanks, I shall tell you what’s what and what feedback I’m needing, instead of being an overly-subtle jerk.

1. A.A.- This category is probably the funnest. All I ask of you is to ask a… well, fictional character I made (not saying who yet!) questions. You must state your state/country initials for joke-related reasons. Also feel free to sign “perky in P.A.” or whatever. I’m going to need at least 4 before the first batch will be released. Thanks!

2. The Wall- I’m going to be coming up with ideas for other things there as well, not just using that place for and idea/sketch pile. If I ask for some feedback or ideas of your own, please respond! Those kind of ideas are really important to me, so I honestly hope you give me some good feedback/intel/whatever!

That sums it up. Post in the comments below if you have any suggestions for anything or questions for A.A. Thanks!

Rants 2.0: Return of the Return with Bonuses in Our Boutique!

Great moons of Neptune! Yes, I, your (hopefully) favorite blogger has returned to his post of ranting, fiction-ing, and trying to tell if those spam comments really are spam or not. So! Let’s get back into the groove again, shall we? First, let’s start of with some news. The C.C. Database is being updated regularly again, hopefully It’ll enter phase-2 completion soon! I decided to add a few things from my SPORE universe (which is an awesome, yet abandoned, game, get it!). Also, there’s a new category in town, “A.A.”. What’s it stand for? What does it mean? Why is it here? All of those will be answered in time.

Now then, where I was over the long gap in posting…

Surgery.

Oral surgery to be precise, but let’s not dig too deep. It was a miserable-yet-enjoyable experience overall. Let’s get this story started.

So one Wednesday afternoon I have to get my wisdom teeth pulled and all, so off to the oral surgeon I went. It was pretty scary at the time, as it was my first time ever getting surgery. (Agh, redundancy! I can’t figure out a better word to use!). After a few minutes of waiting, I’m told to get in this big room with a lot of medical whatsits, lights, and so on. Then I’m told to sit on this huge chair and when I do it leans back with this ominous “HRMMMMMMMMMM” that sounds like that violin chime they play in dramatic movies right before something terrible happens. At that point my survival instinct was yelling at met to run the heck out of there, but with all those lights and whatnot I was actually afraid to even move. While my survival instinct and motor control center were arguing, the nurse puts the big mask on me and tells me to breathe slowly. I could already tell what it was, a gas mask to knock me right out, but the two parts of my mind were still duking it out so I could only stay put in a silent, mental terror. After a few minutes the venomous snake-like hissing of the mask doesn’t seems to matter anymore. At that point I also start laughing uncontrollably. “It’s happening…” I think to myself. “It’s really happening. My first time passing out against my will.” However, thanks to all that chemical gas whatnot my survival instinct and motor control have settled it out and were now drunk on medical gas cocktails. Then the doctor comes in and then…

… I wake up. What the heck…? I was on the chair felling fine-yet-terrified and the next thing you know I’m in a different room with all my facial nerves completely not getting their stuff together and doing their job! And man, did my head hurt. After a while of drinking water and congrats from my parents I head home, feeling a tad less “huh?”. I get home and quickly lie down on the couch to recuperate. I do that for about 5 days, while watching hundreds of Mythbusters episodes. Oh, I also spent a few hours of that time trying to eat tiny food bits and around the end I was actually mentally capable of playing Halo 4 again! Now here I am, all patched up and better.

That’s my story of how it went for those 5-plus days. I feel fine now, there’s still a bit left to do as my 12-year-molars now have to grow in the holes the surgeons made. Other than that, I’m fine. Thanks for asking.

…Not much else to say here. Sorry.

P.S.- Bonus to anyone who can spot the reference I made in the title! It’s a reference to something I refered to in this post here.